The Playground
by Alyssa Liyana Dioquino
Little Liya in the Tagaytay Playgrounds
When we are young, our parents bring us to playgrounds. As children, we find this place to be a jungle of possibilities, a place to explore, a place to be free. Sure, playgrounds are often accompanied by crying (no, really, more like wailing), but in a few seconds, our parents smile, help us brush off what had caused the ruckus, and then try again.
When we grow up, the playground becomes much bigger. We break free from our fishbowls, from our parents’ watchful eyes, and into everyone else’s highly judgemental ones. We learn that recklessness is not an option, and to an extent, that is healthy, up until the point where we stop risking things altogether.
5 years ago, I was at a point where all the calculated risks I had taken had failed . It was very early into my conducting career- and I didn’t know where to turn, suddenly. So, as all my calculating had led me to a dead end, I decided to turn the corner and do exactly everything I didn’t want to do.
When I auditioned for conducting, I distinctly remember being asked why I didn’t take Music Education instead. I remember answering “kasi ayoko po magturo ng bata!” (I don’t want to teach children!) . The panel then asked me “What if a Children’s choir hires you?”, and I was so quick to answer “Mag-no-no po ako!” (I will say no!)
My first concert with the UP Cherubim & Seraphim
Yet here I am on my 5th year as the now Associate Director of the longest standing children’s choirs in the Philippines. I had said yes (as a joke, initially, but we all know how jokes are half-meant), and I have spent five amazing years with the UP Cherubim and Seraphim.
And as I celebrate 5 years with these children, we also celebrate our 50th/golden year. I think back to the five years I have spent with the group and I realize that for the past 5 years, this choir, too, has been my playground. In hindsight, it was the perfect place to begin again for a young musician. It was a place where I was encouraged to take risks, to explore and stretch my capacity as a choral conductor, to fail, to get back up, to try again; a place to learn, and to grow.
Conducting the UP Cherubim & Seraphim also gave me opportunities to conduct for Orchestra
I’ve learned so much more about my life in the past five years. I learned that I actually love to work with children (mostly because I act like a child, but if it works, it works). I learned that even as a conductor, my job is still to be an educator. I was gifted opportunities I never would have had if I hadn’t said yes to this job. I have learned to be patient, I have learned to be creative. I have learned to lecture arm chairs when the kids hit it and start crying, to play the cup song, to comfort them just by being with them. These children have taught me so much more than I dare say I have taught them. They have taught me to put my faith in their little but oh-so-capable hands.
While I was never part of UPCS as a child, I find that as the choir has been their own playground, it has been mine, too. I’ve spoken much about how this playground has been fun to share with the kids, I must give credit, too, to Tita Lenette who has showed nothing but absolute faith in me as a young up-and-come-er. I don’t think I would have dared to do much of what I did if not for her support.
With Lolo Ramon (L) and Tita Lennette (R) during the UPCS 45th anniversary
It was such a blessing to me to find my own playground as a musician, and just into my 5th year, I already know that the years I spend with UPCS will be some of the best years I have spent as a conductor. I hope that many other young musicians find their own playgrounds, their safe spaces, their happy places; that they may never tire of creating beautiful, joyful and meaningful music.
